Destiny and Love
by GhostMbwa
Summary: After Gwen finds out about Merlin's magic a sorcerer threatens Camelot, forcing Merlin to blatantly use magic. Luckily everyone thinks that an unknown warlock named Emrys was the true magic user.
1. It's alright

**This is just something that came into my head while watching Merlin. I'm hoping to continue it, if not...I'm sorry? **

**By the way this is most definitely a reveal fic, with BAMF moments for Merlin because really he doesn't get enough of those in the show.**

**Please Enjoy.**

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><p>CHAPTER ONE<p>

_Gwen POV_

I didn't know what to think about the scene I had walked in on. I had only meant to come to Gauis' chambers for some tonic for a headache that had been pestering me for the past couple of days, the sight that I saw before me was something I never would've guessed.

Merlin was in the middle of the floor surrounded by books which were floating, the pages turning at his will. I couldn't help the gasp that escaped my lips, the thought of Merlin being a sorcerer was *slightly* ridiculous. Yet, here he was.

With the sound of my gasp he looked up at me, his eyes glowing a molten gold. He gulped and blinked and all of the books fell with a loud bang. His eyes flashing back to their normal ocean blue. His expression was one of fear, shock, guilt, and sadness. I couldn't help but stare at him. The shocked silence continued on for several seconds, each of which seemed to go on for an eternity.

Merlin was the first to say anything, "Gwen…it's…not what you think?" If Merlin was anything it was a bad liar. Although saying that he did hide the fact that he was a sorcerer for the past 3 years with nobody even suspecting him.

"Then what is it?" I asked, realizing that I wasn't even really mad. Merlin was so sweet that even if he was a sorcerer there was no way he could be evil. The very idea was laughable. An evil Merlin. I almost *did* laughed.

"Well…" Merlin was stumbling or words, he obviously didn't have a good excuse lined up. He finally just sighed in defeat, "Yes. I'm a warlock." he looked up at my face then, what he saw there must've frightened him. "But I would never do anything to harm Camelot or anyone else! I promise." He sounded frantic.

"Merlin, calm down." I couldn't let my friend continue to worry like he was, "It's okay. I never thought you were evil. But, why didn't you tell me you were a sorcerer?" a bit of pain reached my eyes as I realized he hadn't trusted me enough to tell me. While he stumbled once more for an answer I sat down next to him.

"I couldn't. If anyone found out I would've been put to death. I know that I can trust you and I wanted to tell you but… I suppose it was just too big of a risk." he said while his head sagged so much his chin was resting on his chest. He appeared so vulnerable, not at all the stereotypical sorcerer.

I smiled a bit, Merlin was always so cheerful and energetic to see him like this just wasn't natural. "It's alright Merlin, I understand and trust me you have nothing to fear I would never turn you in." at this his head snapped up and his eyes searched my face, most likely looking for signs of deception, of hatred, of fear.

By the huge grin that was forming on his face he obviously didn't find any. "Thank you so much Gwen. You don't know what that means to me." he immediately pulled me into a hug. I blinked at this but after a second put my arms around him as well. After what was probably a minute of just hugging Merlin released me with a clearing of his throat. "Um, sorry, I…I just didn't really know how anyone would react to knowing I had magic."

He reached his hand up to the back of his head and cast his eyes downward and away from in an awkward fashion that he seemed to be so good at. I smiled at him but my smile faded just a bit after a few seconds, I still had many questions to ask him. "Does anyone else know about you?"

At the question Merlin fidgeted and then sighed, "Only Gauis and my mother of course." the look of defeat which had been on his face turned to one of fear once again, "You can't tell Arthur, if he found out-" his voice faded out leaving me to guess at his words.

"You don't have to worry Merlin. I won't tell anyone. Even Arthur." I smiled at the now pure and cheerful expression on his face. "Of course, if you want to tell anyone I wouldn't be in your way either." I subtly hinted to him, not forcing him but encouraging. The weight of the world seemed to be on his shoulders, the fact that I knew seemed to lighten that burden slightly. Perhaps if he told others the burden would lessen even more.

He laughed slightly at that, a genuine laugh, not one of fear, "Thanks Gwen..maybe I will someday." he smiled at the thought.

"Well, if that day comes I'll fully support you." Hoping he realized the underlying statement that I would do everything in my power to protect him if anything went wrong.

His response was quiet but full of emotion, "Thank you."

A smile that could rival his erupted on my face, "It's no problem." we sat there for a while just smiling, the silence unusually comfortable.

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><p><strong>Sorry if Gwen's acceptance was a bit easily gained, I just feel like she would be the most understanding.<strong>

**Thank you for reading. **

**Hopefully the story will continue...soon.**

**Please Review :)**

** I enjoy criticism as long as it's constructive.**


	2. Yes, I'm a Warlock

**Hello and thank you for all the alerts/favorites! I'd also like to thank my Beta_ Keshobesho._**

**This chapter is like the last one just from Merlin's POV and with a little extra. :)**

**I hope you enjoy my story.**

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

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><p>CHAPTER TWO<p>

_Merlin POV_

This was going to take a long time. The amount of books that I needed to go through to find the correct spell was innumerable. Without the use of magic I would never find it. Thanking the heavens that Gaius was out today I sat on the floor. With a small, traitorous smile which could only come from doing something that I wasn't supposed to I sat down and felt my eyes burn gold.

Even with the help of my magic this was still going to take a while. Trying to find a particular spell that would allow me to transport to a specific place was tricky. Although the thought had crossed my mind to just make one up, the warning I had gotten from Gaius when I voiced this suggestion made me rethink my plan.

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><p><em>Flashback<em>

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><p>Throwing my hands up in defeat I looked over at my guardian, and although I never really referred to him as such, my uncle. This was what seemed like the millionth time that he had told me to be careful, to not use my magic. It was becoming just <em>slightly<em> frustrating. I would save Arthur and get nothing in return, not that I asked for anything, but after a while it's hard to not become just the slightest bit bitter at having to hide who you really are from those you love.

"That's why I came to you with this. I wasn't going to do the spell without knowing the risks." I couldn't help but feel hurt that Gaius still thought me so reckless when it came to something as important as my magic. Although I did sometimes use it when it wasn't strictly necessary it was hard not to do so. I was magic, not using it felt like one of my limbs had been cut off. When I was suppressing my magic it was like I had lost one of my senses.

"I know." Gaius replied with a small sigh barely escaping him. "I just don't want you to get hurt."

I smiled slightly at how much Gaius cared for me. "You know me Gaius, I'm always careful."

The words were meant to ease his mind. I didn't know if I did a good job when I saw the look of concern just intensify on his face.

"You must promise me to not try anything like that spell you were going to do. Magic like that hasn't been tried and even with your enormous power, I don't know what would happen," his words were somewhat rushed. "You cant take the risk of using that type of magic."

His words hung in the air, weighing it down. Scenarios were spinning through both of our minds as we considered the possibilities of what may happen if I used a spell and it all went horribly wrong. If I disregarded his warning and continued on with my experiment. There were happy endings in sight, but also death.

"Please, promise me you won't do anything reckless."

There was that word again, _reckless_. I was starting to believe that that was how everyone saw me. Just some reckless idiot. Although it was probably better that way for most, Gaius thinking the same hurt. He knew what I did and why I did it. If even _he_ thought I was being a reckless idiot, perhaps no one really understood me at all.

But my uncle did understand me. He knew what I did. He knew what I had been through. He understood why I did what I did. Perhaps he didn't really understand how it had felt, how it still feels to be the last of your kind. To have nobody truly like you, but he did understand me. He worried for me and that was something that I would never take for granted. I didn't want him to worry for me as much as he did, but I couldn't very well stop him from doing so.

I smiled at my guardian, my chest filling with love. "I promise."

My words were full of conviction. I would keep this promise until I had no other choice than to break it.

"I wasn't going to do the spell without your permission anyways."

"Thank you, Merlin." my uncle intoned quietly, a small smile playing at his lips.

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><p><em> -End of Flashback-<em>

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><p>The books whirled around me slowly. Or at least to my eyes. Time had slowed down at my will and now although I had already gone through 4 books, it had been less than 5 minutes.<p>

It was easy enough to maintain this type of magic. The type of magic which was most instinctive to me. The type that I had been using ever since I can remember.

Even with time slowed down the process was taking longer than I had intended it to. Perhaps slowing down time wasn't the best option for this kind of work.

Time resumed its normal pattern around me as a plan hatched in my brain. Everything that went through my mind seemed to be a plan. Whether it was just the order in which I was going to do the chores assigned to me by His Royal Pratness or the way I was going to try to save that same man.

I decided to stick to instinctive magic for the time being. I was already beginning to feel more and more myself by using this magic, why not let my true self come out even more fully. Let the magic which resided within me take a bit of control. Let the magic which _was_ me take over.

The books still spun in a circle around me, a single look from me caused one of the books to come forward and bob slightly in front of me. With a wave of my hand the pages began to turn and my eyes quickly scanned each page, searching.

After several more minutes of this I began to wonder if I was ever going to find what I was looking for. I continued to flip the pages, I was so absorbed I didn't notice the creak of a door opening. I did hear the shocked gasp that followed.

I turned abruptly, already inwardly berating myself for not locking the door with magic. As my now gold eyes met chocolate brown orbs I stiffened, my magic ceasing. The books which had been granted my full attention for what seemed like so long, now clattered to the floor forgotten.

I didn't know what to do. This was never supposed to happen. To go through so much, so many times when I used magic to save and to be discovered because I had forgotten to lock the door. If I wasn't so afraid of what was going to happen I may have laughed.

I finally found my voice, realizing that I had just been staring at her. "Gwen…it's…not what you think?"

My voice betrayed me. I never could lie and by the look on her face, she obviously saw right through me. I didn't really think that was going to work but I had to give it a shot. Lying about who I was had been ground into me since the day I was born.

"Then what is it?" she asked, her voice calm. If I was more myself perhaps I would've noticed that her voice held no malice, only curiosity. Perhaps I would've noticed that her eyes seemed gentle and understanding. Problem is I wasn't myself.

"Well…" I began rather meekly even to my own ears. What could I say to her? Did I have to spout a lie which would be looked at suspiciously? Did I have to hide who I was even when the truth was obvious? When the truth was seen? Did I still have to hide?

If I did tell her how was she going to react? I sighed, it didn't really matter, I needed to tell her now. No more lies. "Yes. I'm a Warlock." as soon as the words were out of my mouth I felt my shoulders relax. A weight that I had had for so long had been released.

I looked up at Gwen, finally meeting her eyes. I thought I saw something akin to fear flickering through her eyes. I quickly back tracked. "But I would never do anything to harm Camelot or anyone else!" the words left my mouth quickly, begging for understanding. "I promise."

This vow, was slightly wrong. I would have to harm people, but it was true in the sense that I would do everything in my power to stop it from coming to that. I did not enjoy harming others. It made me slightly ill to even think about it. Yet, I would do anything to protect those who needed it.

Gwen must've heard the desperation in my voice for when she responded, her voice was soft and soothing. "Merlin, calm down. It's okay. I never thought you were evil." I looked up at her when she said this. She sounded so sure, so kind. I didn't understand how she could so easily trust me.

"But, why didn't you tell me you were a Sorcerer?" her voice wasn't angry, just hurt. I felt something close to hope fill me. Could that really be all she was upset about? The fact that I had kept this from her. Not that I was a Warlock.

"I couldn't," the words came out softer than I intended them to. I let my head fall as I spoke, ashamed at myself for not trusting Gwen. "If anyone had found out I would've been put to death. I _know_ that I can trust you and I wanted to tell you but…I suppose it was just too big of a risk." The excuses sounded weak and dull on my tongue.

There was a palpable pause in the air. Neither of us spoke for a while. My shame burned in my chest and eyes. Tears almost threatened to fall, but I wouldn't let them.

"It's alright Merlin, I understand and trust me you have nothing to fear, I would never turn you in." As she said the words I couldn't help but snap my head up to look at her. To look at this amazing friend who was so caring. Searching her face all I saw was honesty and love. My lips twitched and before long a huge smile had filled my face and the hope that had been growing in my chest burst and filled my whole body.

"_Thank you so much_ Gwen." I tried to put as much emotion in my words as I could to assure her that what I said was true. "You have no idea what that means to me." The next thing I knew I was hugging her, trying to get across my emotions with more than just words.

As I hugged her my emotions settled slightly and as they did I realized that I had been holding Gwen tightly to me for at least a minute. I pulled back casting my eyes downward and bringing my hand to the back of my head in an unconscious gesture. "Um, sorry." I began awkwardly. "I…I just didn't really know how anyone would react to knowing I had magic."

The statement was true. I had fretted over the reactions of my friends to this reveal ever since I had come to Camelot. I had imagined so many different ways that this could have gone down. I had imagined the ones where I had died with hate filled eyes staring at me. The eyes belonging to those I thought of as friends. I had also imagined a version where they understood. Where they excepted me for who I was. I couldn't believe that what had actually occurred was the latter. I had always thought that was just a fantasy.

"Does anyone else know about you?" Gwen asked, curiosity filling her features.

All I could do was sigh. I knew this question was coming. "Only Gaius." I knew I could trust Gwen not to turn him in for knowing about me. "And my mother of course." The last statement came out as more of an afterthought if anything. The next thought filled my mind with dread. What if Gwen did feel the need to tell someone? "You can't tell Arthur, if he found out-" images of what could happen filled my mind. Maybe I wasn't giving Arthur enough credit, yet I didn't want to take the chance that my fears of what he would do would come true.

"You don't have to worry Merlin. I won't tell anyone. Even Arthur." I relaxed as she promised, knowing that Gwen was a woman of her word. She would not betray me. "Of course, if you want to tell anyone I wouldn't be in your way either." I couldn't help but laugh slightly at her words, of all the reactions I had imaged I had never suspected such a warm welcome. Such an understanding from the very start. Once again I felt my chest warm.

"Thanks Gwen…maybe I will someday." Maybe I would. I knew that one day I would eventually have to reveal who I was, but perhaps that day could be sooner rather than later.

"Well, if that day comes I'll fully support you."

The warm feeling that had been sporadically entering my chest seemed bent on staking permanent residence. "_Thank you_."

"It's no problem."

As she smiled at me I knew that I had another ally. I had another friend who knew my secret. Someone I could depend on and talk to. I would try not to burden her with too much, but it felt good to have someone other than Gaius whom I could talk to.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading.<strong>

**Please tell me if you want me to spend a little time where Gwen knows and what life is like for Merlin with another person who knows his secret or if I should just jump into the action. Your input would be greatly appreciated. :)**

**Review?**


	3. The Magic

**Thank you once again for the reviews and story alerts/favorites.**

**So the plot moves forward more in this chapter...kind of... the action is coming fairly soon so don't worry.**

**Please Enjoy.**

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin.

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><p>CHAPTER THREE<p>

_Merlin POV_

We sat there in a warm silence for quite a while, each of us just smiling. Eventually that silence had to be broken.

"Merlin…" Gwen's voice sounded oddly unsure for the first time in this whole conversation. "Would you mind…um.."

"What is it?" I asked, now curious.

Gwen began to fiddle with the hem of her skirt and her eyes wouldn't meet mine. Instead they were firmly fixated on the ground.

"Just ask, I'm sure whatever it is I'll be more than willing to give an answer." I tried to coax the question out of her. A strange and wild curiosity beginning in my mind.

"Well…" she began and I stayed silent, waiting for her to continue. "I was just wondering if you might…showmesomemagic." the words were spoken so quickly I had to blink several times as my mind tried to make sense of the noise.

Eventually I gave up on the task of understanding what she had said and although I didn't want to make her even more uncomfortable I had to know what she asked to give her an answer. "I'm sorry…what did you ask?"

I watched, curiosity boiling just beneath the surface of my demeanor, struggling to become free as Gwen took a deep breath and began once again. This time slower. "I was wondering if you would…show me some magic?"

I blinked once slowly; the request took me by surprise. I knew that she had accepted me, but for her to accept my magic so fully as well sent a torrent of emotions through me.

"Really?" I was ecstatic! I loved to use my magic and for someone to actual request the use of it felt like a dream.

"Yes. I'd like to see what you can do…Plus, what you were doing earlier was amazing." Gwen replied with a huge, genuine smile.

I smiled right back, not being able to help myself as pure unadulterated joy overtook me. "Then, of course! Did you have anything specific in mind?" I asked the question even though I knew she did not know much of magic, I didn't want to alarm her by doing something that she wasn't prepared for.

Gwen took a moment to consider. "Well, would you mind showing me how you did what you were doing before?"

I smiled and nodded. "Sure." I was relieved at her request, I was afraid she may have asked for the impossible.

With a flick of my wrist most every object in the room began to float several feet off the ground. I grinned as I felt the familiar thrum of magic tumble through me, settling as it always did in my eyes. This type of magic had begun to become easier and easier for me as of late. My powers seemed to be growing even more, if that was possible. The magic that I had once required words to activate was now easily done with just a thought, an instinct. At first I was worried that I would lose control of this new found power that had begun to build inside of me. Now I realized that it was just another part of me which I would live with and most likely enjoy.

I turned to look at Gwen, my eyes still burning with magic. Her expression was one of happiness and inquisitiveness. As she turned to look at me her smile grew and in turn so did mine. This simple innocuous display of magic felt so right. So natural. I felt a pang as I realized I wouldn't always be able to do this.

"Can you show me more?" Gwen asked in a quiet voice, but her eyes were still boring into mine, unflinching.

I nodded and continued to smile. Leaving the items floating I brought my palm up slowly. With no words a ball of luminescent fire about the size of my fist burst into life an inch above my palm. With a thought the flame turned an electric blue and burned higher and hotter. Raising my other hand I conjured another ball of flame, turning this one a dark, shimmering purple. As the flames danced in my hands I looked up at Gwen. Her eyes were flickering between the two fires as if she couldn't decide which to stare at. She seemed enraptured by the light they produced.

Looking back at the conjured fire I quickly changed the temperature of the blue flame. The change occurred so quickly that it froze, deceptively looking as if it was still in a state of motion. _Frozen Fire_, I thought with a smirk, this may come in handy.

The Frozen Fire, as I now called it, was scintillating under the rays of sun. The Frozen Fire was in actuality ice, but if I so willed it could move and burn just like fire. The effects it could have in battle would be devastating. The enemy would be engulfed by something even more potent than fire. The Frozen Fire would feel as hot, or perhaps even hotter than fire, when in reality it was just so frigidly cold it burned.

I snapped out of my thoughts when Gwen asked for me to show her more magic. It was exhilarating, she really wanted to see more, she was even impatient to see more.

Flicking both of my wrists both balls of fire leapt from their positions above my hands to float and twirl several feet above our heads. The next spell I was going to do required words and I hesitated. Although I knew that Gwen would be accepting she never had never actually heard me incant anything before. Taking a deep breath to steady myself and after a plethora of reassuring thoughts racing through my mind I was ready.

"_áscildan_." Even though I whispered the word it still came out deep and resonated through the room. The power of the Old Religion being enlaced in the word it was no surprise. I raised my palm and focused my eyes on one of the twirling flames above my head. Immediately a soft sparkling gold box appeared around the flame, encasing it. With a thought the flame grew out of control, pushing at the sides of the shield, trying to escape but to no avail. The shield shimmered gold as the fire "attacked" it.

The flame inside began to swirl, faster and faster. Due to the encasing surrounding it the spiraling flame appeared to be gold.

"_Gehíwlæcan_." with the one simple word the shield changed from its box shape to that of a sphere. The color also changed to one of a swirling blue and gold, the colors seemed to be in a never ending battle for dominance, neither one ever gaining the upper hand.

I curled my fingers slightly and the sphere became smaller, more compact. The fire inside rebelled becoming even more violent and unstable for several seconds before calming down to a slow swirl once more. The flame inside took on the color of the shield, the pattern it created became mesmerizing. Even though there were only two colors the shades that each held were seemingly infinite.

I pried my eyes unwillingly away from the display to gauge Gwen's reaction. Her mouth was slack-jawed and her eyes fixed upon the shield and fire unblinking. It took most of my will power to not laugh at how much she seemed to love my use of magic. This was the best reaction to my magic I think I'd ever get or gotten. Although Lancelot had taken the news well there wasn't enough time for me to really tell how he had reacted. Plus, he hadn't known me for very long once he found out my secret. I hadn't lied to him for _years_ before he found out.

"Would you like to see more?" I asked, my voice perhaps just a bit too excited. Gwen, still fully focused on the spherical shield just nodded her acquiesce. The smile that had been plastered on my face grew even bigger than it already was.

I shook my head minimally and flicked my wrist, a light breeze suddenly blew around us until it settled into a mini-whirlwind in between us. With another minimal flick of my wrist another whirlwind appeared to the right of the other. They circled each other, spinning faster and faster. My short hair was picked up by the force of the wind and blown in as many directions as the wind seemed to manage. The feeling was in an essence euphoric. The wind was soft, not biting, and warm. It seemed to caress the skin and warm the body.

Looking at the two small, but majestic, spirals of wind in front of me I couldn't help but laugh. This type of magic used to be so difficult. Memories of hours spent trying to accomplish these spells filled my mind. The spells never seemed to cooperate with me until I had truly given up! Just when I thought that it was useless, that I had no chance at getting the spell to work, POOF, the spell began to work for me. Now whenever I learned a new spell it worked almost immediately, sometimes it even worked on my first try. Something had changed within me, whether it was for better or for worse could only be told with time.

I was becoming high on the use of magic. I never wanted to stop. I wanted to be like this always, using my magic for silly non-battle related things. I wanted to help the harvest grow, make it rain when there was a drought, or even just use it to conjure up toys for the children in the village. I wanted to be care-free. I wanted to be _me_. It was an impractical dream. Eventually I would be able to tell Arthur and everyone else about my magic, but for now I needed to remain in hiding. I needed to remain in disguise.

With a look from my blazing gold eyes the two mini-whirlwinds began to make lazy circles around the room, sporadically coming closer to the middle of the room only to recede back to the edge once more. I followed the movement of the wind even though I didn't need to anymore, they would still move without my eyes. I just loved the open display.

Fixing my eyes once more on Gwen I smiled my cheekiest grin at her before clapping both of my hands together while I felt my eyes burn with more intensity than before. Right as my hands connected together all of the dust in the room sprung up off of the ground and rushed to the area just above my clasped hands. The dust condensed until it was one rock like object the size of a mug. When I lifted my head the rock followed upwards until it stopped a few inches from the ceiling. With one last mischievous smirk I unclasped my hands quickly. At the movement the rock exploded in a flurry of multi-colored lights and smaller explosions.

I looked at Gwen, if she had been impressed before, I don't even know how to describe her facial expression now. It wasn't awe, or fear, it was something else. It was adoration. That's the only emotion I could think of which could cause that type of expression on someone's face.

"It's beautiful." Gwen murmured more to herself than me.

Nothing else coming to mind, I said the first cheeky thing that came to mind. "Thank you."

Gwen turned to me and laughed slightly. "That's right, you did make this all happen didn't you. For a second there I was so enthralled I forgot!"

I laughed along with her. My thoughts kept going back to the fact that she had accepted me, that she was comfortable around me and my magic. My thoughts kept going back I knew because I could barely believe it.

"Do you want to see anything more?" I asked, still hesitant even though she had proven she trusted me and wasn't going to turn me in.

"Yes….I would love to see more." There was that word again, love. I had heard it a lot but never really pertaining to my magic. Sure I had used it when speaking of my magic, but for someone else to do the same was startling. It threw me just the slightest bit off balance.

"Alright, because I was going to do more anyways." I retreated into my teasing attitude in an attempt to settle myself. I really shouldn't have been this unsettled by the fact that she had accepted me. Yet, I couldn't help myself. The fact that for my whole life I had been taught to keep this a secret, that if I did tell anyone they would hold nothing but animosity towards me was playing a big factor in my uneasiness.

Gwen for her part just laughed lightheartedly and smiled, waiting. She seemed to like the bright and alive magic; so that's what I was going to give her.

" _Fromum feohgiftum on fæder bearme._" As soon as the words left my mouth a familiar ball of swirling energy and light appeared in my palm. It glowed brilliantly. The energy twirled, a mixture of gold, blue, and silver. A rush of memory from long ago entered my mind. Hazy images of Arthur stuck in a cave so dark it seemed like death itself. Images of Gwen and Gaius conversing in hushed, worried tones. I shook my head at the memories, dispelling them. The energy continued to swirl and as the energy became brighter another orb formed to the right of the first one. This orb was spinning slower, it was calmer than the first. Staring at the two orbs I once again lost myself to memories, the ones that were supposedly forgotten or not even known. It seemed I would be lost to the world forever, reliving these memories.

"What. Is going. On?." the harshly spoken words made the once light atmosphere immediately stiffen. I was pulled back to the world, a feat that only could've been accomplished by two things, the first being the fact that someone was in danger, the second being if someone had walked in on my open display of magic.

Depending on how you look at it the actual reason I was pulled back to reality could be a blessing or a curse. Someone had just walked into the room where there was currently, two whirlwinds spinning about, a bunch of lights still sparkling in the air, two balls of fire floating above Gwen and my heads, one of which was surrounded by a golden sphere, and two balls of light bobbing in the space between me and Gwen. Not to mention that every single object in the room was still hovering a few feet above the ground. This was the room that this unsuspecting resident of Camelot had walked into. A room where magic was so present; a room where my eyes were still burning a deep, luxurious gold.

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><p><strong>I felt so evil leaving it there...anyways, I hope you enjoyed.<strong>

**I keep debating with myself about the time line so if you could I would appreciate it if you gave me your input on whether Arthur should be King or not at this point. Or if he should be Regent or something...please?**

**Here are the definitions for the spells I used.**

_**áscildan**- _to protect

_**gehíwlæcan**_- to form shape fashion color

_**Fromum feohgiftum on fæder bearme**.- _With his father's friends by fee and gift. (I got this definition from a website which had spells Merlin has used in the show on it…so I don't know if it's correct or not.)

**Once again I'd like to thank my Beta, _KeshoBesho_.**

** Review? **


	4. The Understanding

**Hi, I just wanted to inform you that the timeline for this story has changed slightly. Instead of being 3 years since Merlin came to Camelot I am now making it around 6…so this fanfiction is now taking place sometime after season 4 episode 2.**

**The rest of this story is going to be in Merlin's point of view most likely so I'm going to stop saying it. Although, if there is a point of view change I will acknowledge it, don't worry.**

**Thank you once again for review and alerting…Also, I would once again like to thank my beta _KeshoBesho_ who told me that this chapter wasn't bad like I thought it was at first.**

**_~Please Enjoy~_**

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin. :(

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><p>CHAPTER FOUR<p>

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><p>"What. Is going. On?" A very harsh voice demanded once again, this time just slightly slower and a bit more incredulous.<p>

I panicked. All the magic in the room immediately ceased, I hadn't even seen who was there yet, all I knew was that someone _was_ here. Someone who may or may _not_ know about me. There was a resounding crash as all of the once floating objects fell unceremoniously to the ground, some of the glass breaking. The whirlwinds abruptly spun out of existence, the orbs of fire sputtered a bit but then winked out of this plane. The still sparkling dust lost its shine, reverting back to normal dust floating in the air on a breeze. As for the lights in front of me they flared brightly before joining the rest of the magic in a world of oblivion.

I was frozen. I couldn't look up. I couldn't face the person who had walked in. It didn't matter who it was, all I knew was that they had seen me using magic and I was going to die. The thought wouldn't leave me alone, it just kept repeating, stopping all other thoughts. Nothing else would process. _I was going to die. I'm _going_ to die. I'm going to die._

Once again I was pulled from my mind by a voice, this time I recognized it. "You know, you could've at least locked the door."

It was Gaius. I had never been so happy to hear his voice in my life. My head snapped up so quickly I was sure to get whip-lash. The sight of my mentor, friend, and guardian filled me with so much relief I felt as though I was going to burst with the emotion. As it happens I did.

"Gaius!" I stood up quicker than a normal human necessarily could and rushed towards the man. Once I was close enough I ensnared him in a huge hug. I couldn't stop myself, so much relief was pumping through me that it was palpable in the air.

"Oof!" The noise was made as soon as my arms encircled my uncle and although there was a bit of indignation in the exclamation it was mostly just surprise.

I kept him in that embrace longer than strictly needed. I just couldn't seem to let go. The relief did slowly ebb away, leaving in its place a type of nervousness.

"Merlin, you can let go of me now." Gaius' voice startled me slightly and although I had already come to the conclusion myself that I had been holding the man for longer than I probably should've when I stepped away I couldn't seem to stop the blush that began to burn on my face.

"Um…yeah, sorry about that. I thought you were someone else when you first walked in." My hand had once again taken a residence on the back of my head, rubbing up and down softly, nervously.

"I can tell, but really Merlin, you didn't even think to lock the door when you were going to be using magic so blatantly?" his tone was slightly harsh to the untrained ear, but being around him so long I could read the concern that was laced in the undertone of his words.

I smiled at him just a bit sheepishly. "Well.." I wasn't allowed to finish my sentence as Gaius had decided to look around the room and his eyes settled on something-someone.

"Merlin." The tone of Gaius' voice had changed drastically now. It wasn't that concerned, this time it was reproaching. I immediately stiffened and my hand stopped its movement on the back of my head.

After the initial shock I laughed nervously, trying to ease the tense atmosphere Gaius' tone had created. I failed quite marvelously.

"Merlin. Did you show Gwen your magic?" his tone was now calm, the sudden change in tone scared me more than his reproachful one just seconds ago. This tone was one I had never heard him use before. It was…scary. Perhaps even more frightening than all of the sorcerer's I had faced together. It was ridiculous that just a tone of voice could frighten me so much, yet it did.

"Well, not so much as told her as…she walked in on me doing magic just like you did. Although, not to the degree of magic you observed." I decided to be completely truthful, because that was best right?

"You mean, you were just doing magic without any thought and anybody could've walked in and seen you?" his voice was strained, he was trying to maintain a cool demeanor but his mask was slipping, cracking.

"I would've thought that was obvious when you walked in…" my voice trailed off when I saw the expression on my guardian's face. Perhaps I was pushing it too far.

"If I may interject." Gwen's voice came as such a surprise to me that I jumped almost a whole foot in the air. "I'm perfectly fine with Merlin having magic."

The statement was said so casually. I saw Gaius blink several times, obviously startled by the firmness and protectiveness enlaced with her words. If I hadn't known it was ridiculous I would've assumed the words were said with magic.

I couldn't help but turn and look at Gwen then. She was still by my side now even after all of the betrayal magic had brought upon her. She was still one of my best friends, despite her new found knowledge. She was even defending my use of magic to Gaius. It was truly surreal to feel so accepted and loved. A smile, completely unwarranted given the situation, was spreading slowly, but steadily across my face and into my eyes.

"In fact, " Gwen continued on when she realized neither Gaius or I were inclined to speak at the moment. "I think it's brilliant, beatific if I may say so. Now that I actually look, magic fits with Merlin perfectly. They were made for each other."

I'm fairly certain my smile deepened at the compliment, I couldn't help it; I had never been treated like this before. With the emotions that came with Gwen's words I was utterly speechless. I wanted to say something, but I didn't know what words could encompass what I was feeling. There were so many emotions. So, I did the only thing I could think of. I once again pulled Gwen into a hug. I seemed to be overly emotional today.

Gwen returned the hug almost greedily. My magic flared just slightly and I felt her emotions. At first I stiffened at the sudden onslaught of feelings and thoughts. I immediately relaxed when I actually concentrated on the emotions. They were so peaceful and happy; they were comforting. I almost gasped when I felt how heart felt her words were. She really thought that my magic was amazing. Everything she was feeling was becoming an open book to me. This had never happened before and I couldn't stop myself from looking and feeling at the emotions she projected so openly; at least projected to me and my magic.

If Gaius hadn't cleared his throat to notify us that we'd been standing like that for quite a long time, I don't think I ever would've stepped out of the sanctuary that her emotions had created for me. It was like I had become something that I had read in that magic book Gaius had given me, oh so long ago. Although, I know I had heard of beings that were able to sense other's emotions and thoughts, for the life of me I couldn't remember what they were called.

"You really think that of Merlin?" his voice was unsure and nervous as he awaited a response.

Gwen stepped out of the embrace we had been partaking in for the better part of three minutes. "Yes." It was just one word, but once again it was full of what I at first thought was power. Though, now that I think about it, it may just be the strength of her emotions which I now inexplicably could feel.

"Thank you." The words were sudden and emotional. They were the last words I had expected from Gaius, but perhaps the words I should've been waiting for. Gaius was like my father and even through my haze of fear I should've known that he would be relieved that someone other than himself knew about me and loved me the more for my gift. Loved me for who I was, not who I pretended to be.

Snapping out of my thoughts I noticed that Gwen was now being hugged by my almost crying uncle. She looked so bewildered and yet soothing at the same time I couldn't help but laugh. There was really no other response to the reaction of the girl who had been hugged so many times that day for one singular reason. Her acceptance.

I was still laughing when they disengaged from the embrace and turned to look at me, disapproval thinly veiling amusement in both set of eyes. When I just continued to laugh, keeling over just slightly as I did so, they both joined me. The whole situation was quite ridiculous. I mean, the actual topic was serious and emotion heavy but the reactions from all of us to the revelations were so off-key it was laughable. None of us knew how the other was going to react to the information and when we did learn we were completely shocked. It was just a big circle of confusion and confusion always seems to lead to laughter. At least when I'm involved it does, I wonder why that is?

We were all still in hysterics when a clearing of a throat could be heard, somehow reverberating around the room. The noise had all three of us spinning on our heels to look at the intruder. My hand twitched at my side as I turned, ready to protect and direct magic.

It turns out my worries were completely unnecessary, for in the doorway stood the one and only Once and Future King of Albion, Arthur. Not some evil sorcerer or anything of the sort which needed to be taken care of with magic. I immediately relaxed my hand, feeling slightly foolish.

"What's going on here?" Arthur asked in a serious tone. That was never good, he was only completely serious when something important was happening, or going to happen.

"Nothing really. Why have you come?" I tried to sound nonchalant and casual. In truth I was the exact opposite. Although not because I was nervous that he would find out about my secret, but because the problem he seemed to be facing at the moment was big enough for him to actually come to me for help.

"There's someone who has requested an audience with the King…" I bit my tongue to hold off a laugh at the fact that Arthur still didn't call himself King. He still always referred to himself in the third person when he said "The King" and it was getting harder and harder not to laugh.

"So you need me there to hold your hand and help you through it?" I said, fake sympathy and just a slightly mocking tone inserted in the words.

Arthur huffed and crossed his arms over his chest in a very, "I'm the King" pose. Another laugh threatened to escape my mouth but I pushed it back, laughing when Arthur was so serious wouldn't be the cause of anything good.

"No Merlin. I just thought that since you _are_ my servant you _might_ want to be there." The sarcasm was clear in his voice and to anyone else the words may have been construed as being malicious. Yet to me I knew that they were just his way of saying that he needed me. For what felt like the millionth time in just one hour I felt a warmth spread through my chest. I shook my head slightly as the warmth continued to pulse, I really needed to get my emotions under control.

"You do have a point there, _Sire_." I put as much sarcasm into the last word as I could and bowed so deeply that it was comical.

I could feel Arthur rolling his eyes at my antics while I was still bowing but he didn't say a word. Straightening I quickly matched Arthur's mood when I saw the look on his face. He was genuinely concerned about something and not just slight concern either. Something about this upcoming meeting was bothering him.

"So, should we go?" There was no more teasing in my tone, for some reason this meeting was important and I was going to make sure that Arthur had someone with him during it that he could trust.

Picking up on my now serious tone Arthur smiled grimly, "Yes." As he turned to leave Arthur's emotions hit me full on and I stumbled slightly at the intensity of them. It was just like it had been with Gwen, I could feel his emotions. This new ability of mine was getting a bit out of hand. Yet, it could also be very useful, if I knew how to control it; or knew for certain that it was an actual ability. The emotions snapped me out of my thoughts, demanding my attention.

There was determination running deeply within him, but that was probably just because of how Arthur always was. The more interesting emotions were the fear and anxiety. They were slight yes, but the fact that they were there was surprising. I had known Arthur for a very long time now and the only times that Arthur ever showed even the least bit of fear was in very dire situations. This meeting, that brought out those types of emotions in the King of Albion, was sure to be interesting if nothing else.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed! <strong>

**Reviews make me smile and add more Merlin Magic to my stories. :)**

**Next on Destiny and Love:**

_They would infiltrate my brain, throwing their worries and fears at me with abandon. I didn't know how much more of this I could take. If I couldn't get a handle on this I would have to become a recluse. _

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_I tensed at his hesitation, whatever he said next would inevitably change life in Camelot for quite some time. By the way this man was speaking I had to guess that the change would be for the worse._

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	5. The Empath

**Hello! Sorry for the delay of this chapter. I hurt my hand and it has become quite difficult to type...yeah, I know, not much of an excuse.**

**Once again I'd like to thank everyone for the reviews and alert/favorites. I'd also like to thank my beta _KeshoBesho_.**

_Special Thanks to Alaia Skyhawk who inadvertently gave me the title for this chapter._

_Do I thank too much? Aw, well. Please Enjoy._

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><p>CHAPTER FIVE<p>

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><p>The throne room was full. The walls were lined with rows of people and there was only open space in the middle of the crowd starting at the door and opening to a wider berth of area when it came to around ten feet in front of the throne. Arthur was already sitting in said throne, but he was squirming just a bit in his seat, impatiently waiting for the man who had caused such a ruckus to converge on "his" throne room.<p>

I was also having trouble standing still. My new found power was intermittently activating and I was beginning to feel a massive headache forming behind my eyes at the onslaught of emotions and thoughts coming from the various citizens in the room. This power was becoming cumbersome in the fact that I couldn't control it at all. One minute there would be no one else in my mind except for myself, the way it should be, and the next five different beings would seemingly attack me. They would infiltrate my brain, hurling their worries and fears at me with abandon. I didn't know how much more of this I could take. If I couldn't get a handle on this I would have to become a recluse.

The doors swung open in an overly showy manner and a man, no more than 5 foot 8 stepped through the doors. He had slightly greasy chocolate brown hair that looked as if he hadn't washed it in over four days. Said hair went down to around the middle of his face, resting slightly on his cheeks. Pain and anxiety were flickering in the back of his dully murky brown eyes. His clothes were ripped slightly in various places and mud stained his boots.

As he walked through the sliver of open area to kneel in front of Arthur I noticed that he was favoring his right leg, obviously trying to hide an injury. So whatever information he was here to release it had obviously harmed him to get. This information must be something dangerous, not that I didn't know this before, with Arthur's mood it was hard not to know.

Now that I was looking with more a physicians eye I could tell that the man's left arm had also been injured as he was holding it slightly closer to his body. His elbow was also bent in an unconscious way to stop more pain from radiating through the injury. There were small cuts littered all over his face as if he ran through the forest quickly, not taking time to brush aside branches with his hands beforehand. He had obviously been in a hurry to leave wherever he had gotten the first two injuries.

The man finally reached the open area in front of Arthur and once he did he knelt down, quietly intoning, "My Lord."

"You may rise." Arthur responded in an equally quiet manner. The man rose slowly not putting any weight on his right leg and holding his left arm closer to his body to keep it from jostling. He kept his head down, refusing to look into the eyes of the King.

"My King," the stranger began, his head remaining bowed, "I am sorry to say that I come here with unfortunate information." The man's voice was still very quiet and to compensate everyone in the room had now become deathly silent. No one moved even a muscle in fear that the movement would cause a noise which would block out the voices of their King and the still unnamed stranger.

The man audibly gulped before he continued, raising his head minimally but keeping his eyes downcast. I tensed at his hesitation, whatever he said next would inevitably change life in Camelot for quite some time. By the way this man was speaking I had to guess that the change would be for the worse.

As the man continued to hesitate a volley of emotions penetrated my defenses, yet this time they were only coming from only one man. I closed my eyes and couldn't help but cringe slightly as the feelings circulated through me, invading my senses. They were so powerful and all consuming that I couldn't even get a sense of what they were at first. All I knew was that they were painful. They ripped through me like I was nothing but wind.

I forced myself to take a couple of deep breaths and push back against the unwanted emotions. After what seemed like a week of struggling I could finally discern what the emotions were. There was a deep-seated fear which made my stomach churn and head ache, but what was even more palpable was the grief. This man felt as if he had done something wrong. The emotions were those of someone who had betrayed someone that they loved dearly.

Before I could dwell on my discovery a new sensation wrapped itself around my mind and my fists curled at the intrusion. _Why am I such a failure? I couldn't even stop them. I am so weak. I do not deserve anything but death for my betrayal. I couldn't protect them and now I have to ask the ones I wished to protect for help._

I stiffened; the thoughts were not mine.

Images flashed through my mind, horrific scenes. Death and blood. I felt extreme anger and sorrow when I saw a young girl, no older than seven, stabbed with an invisible sword. I knew on some level that these feelings weren't mine, but that didn't seem to matter. I could feel tears pour down my face in the memory, I tried to stand but to no avail. I could not do anything. More of my friends died needlessly around me at the hands of a man who I couldn't even see. Fear filled me when I saw another shimmer of a weapon close in on me.

I tried to remind myself that these images weren't really of me but the power of them continued to surge through my body and I was helpless to it. I would not be able to stop it before they wanted to cease.

More images of friends falling to the invisible and children screaming filled my brain before suddenly ceasing. I was pulled out of the memories of the man in front of me by Arthur's voice. I had never been so glad to hear his supercilious tone.

"Well?" Although I said his tone was supercilious in reality it was gentle and kind, but really who ever thinks of those qualities when they think of Arthur?

Both I and the man shook our head at the same time, dispelling the memories which now plagued both of us. "Right, yes, sorry." The man said quickly, obviously embarrassed to have lost so much of his composure in front of the King.

I smirked at his antics, I always thought it was quite humorous how citizens became so flustered in front of Arthur. Actually, to be truthful it wasn't really the citizens reactions to being around Arthur that was funny, it was Arthur's reaction. He always blushed and nothing is funnier than a blushing King.

"I have come to inform you that an army is planning to attack Camelot." For the first time since the man entered the room his voice was loud and clear. His head had also raised and he was now looking Arthur directly in the eye, no doubt trying to show that he wasn't lying and to try to make the King take his warning seriously.

Throughout the room there was silence. The news had stunned all of those in Camelot into a stupor. Not one person dared to speak until the man had finished. They needed to know exactly who it was that was going to attack their home.

"The army is being led by a sorcerer whom I do not know the name of. Although I can tell you that he is massively powerful." As the man continued I could feel a collective wondering about how this man knew this information flit across the room from person to person.

It was almost as if the man could also read the thoughts of those around him for his eyes suddenly widened and he became slightly frantic in his explanation. "I know this because my village was attack by the sorcerer's army. He killed so many without even presenting himself in front of us. The only thing we saw were what looked like shimmers in the air and then those same shimmers were attacking us, effectively killing as well as a sword could."

At his words I removed my gaze from the man opting to look at the ground instead. His memories were still clear in my mind and I knew exactly how terrifying those seemingly harmless shimmers actually were. Although I now could not see the citizens of Camelot, who had gathered within the room, I could now hear gasps coming from several citizens. I knew what those gasps held. Fear. Fear of the sorcerer whom had killed so many without even trying. Killed without a care. I could almost feel the hatred for magic rise in the room, and due to my new ability I probably could.

"I just narrowly escaped death myself. I was told-" The man once again looked down and his voice became quieter. "I was told that I should inform you of the upcoming attack. They said they _wanted_ you to be ready for them." The man was now visibly shaking with regret and fear.

"They also told me to inform the unnamed protector of Camelot that they were looking forward to battling him." At his words I snapped my head back up to look at the man. The sorcerer must know about me. Although the fact that he didn't use either of my names to identify me in the warning told me that perhaps he didn't really know _who_ was protecting Camelot. He must just know that someone with magic has been protecting the city. I let out a breath trying to calm down and keep my mind away from more grim possibilities.

"Who is this "unnamed protector" that they speak of?" Arthur asked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"I do not know. That is all I was told." The _also_ unnamed man replied.

The furrow in Arthur's brow deepened and his eyes seemed to dull slightly, to anybody else it may have looked like he was suspicious of the man. However I knew that the expression actually meant he was thinking deeply about what the man had said. Sure he was probably a little bit suspicious, but not enough to actually suspect anything malicious of the man who gave such information to him.

"Thank you. You will be rewarded for telling us this." Arthur said in common procedure, but his voice was monotone and he was obviously not really in the room anymore. His thoughts elsewhere.

"Thank you milord. Although I don't feel like I deserve such praise for delivering such bad news." The man intoned in a voice completely opposite of Arthur's, in other words, full of emotion. With those words the man, who still hadn't given his name, left the throne room quickly.

Arthur remained in his seat while the rest of the civilians also left. They all left whispering in worried tones, glancing back at their King with looks of what could only be desperation on their faces. Arthur kept a stoic expression plastered to his face until the last of the citizens had left. His mask then tumbled off with a sigh of relief and the confusion and worry could be clearly seen etched into his features.

"I'm sure it's going to be alright." I said nonchalantly, trying my best to comfort him without revealing anything about the plan that was now forming within my mind.

"And why do you say that Merlin?" Arthur's voice held some irritation in it which I took as a good sign that he was coming out of his worries slightly.

"Well, Camelot is very strong, thanks to you, and I'm sure that we can handle this." A small, hopefully soothing, smile was tugging at my lips as I turned and looked at Arthur.

"Yes, because if my servant says it, it _must_ be true." The words were somewhat of an ongoing joke between the two of us. For every time he said something like that my words came to fruition.

I just smiled an impish grin back at him, tilting my head lightly so he got the full effect of the sarcasm I was conveying without speaking. He just rolled his eyes at me and my smile grew causing him to sigh in what could be construed as exasperation. I took it as friendship, quite a leap I know, but I have been around him for a very long time.

"Why don't you take the rest of the day off Merlin? You could probably use the rest." Arthur's voice was genuine and I startled backwards just a bit. Arthur never asked me to take a day off unless something really bad was happening, or going to happen, and even then it was rare.

"I-I guess so…are you sure you'll be okay?" I couldn't resist asking, he had been acting so strange lately.

"Of course! Who do you take me for?" Arthur's voice was sarcastic, but I could hear the undertone of fear in his voice; or perhaps I could feel it. This new power of mine made me doubt everything.

"Right. Well…I'll see you soon Arthur." I decided to give him some space. Perhaps he just needed some time alone with his thoughts to sort through some things. Then again I could be way off. It was hard to tell, even with my new ability.

I began to walk away from him turning back just slightly to make sure he was alright. If it wasn't for my magic I'm sure I wouldn't have heard the next thing he said.

"Thank you." His voice was so quiet for a minute I thought I had imagined it.

"You're welcome." I said with a smile; I seemed to be doing that a lot lately. Smiling. I had yet to decide if it was a good or bad thing. Judging by the look on Arthur's face when I smiled I'm leaning towards the former.

Exiting the throne room I couldn't help but sigh at the ridiculousness my life had become. For one, Gwen now knew my secret. Not only that, but she was perfectly comfortable with it. I'd say she was even more comfortable around me now than when she didn't know about me. Another thing is this attack which is going to happen. The fact that some sorcerer out there knows about me is a bit disconcerting. Admittedly I have been making a bit of a ruckus by defeating many enemies but I guess I assumed that since no one in Camelot noticed, nobody outside had either. I should know better than to assume by now.

Lost in my own thoughts I didn't notice the fact that I had already arrived at the doors leading into the physician chambers, and in turn my room. Instead I continued to stand right in front of them, head down and thoughts racing. I most likely would've stayed that way for quite some time if it wasn't for the fact that someone opened the door. That someone was Gaius.

"Merlin, what do you think you're doing?" His voice was quiet yet concerned. Although some would say it held disapproval I knew otherwise. I spent so much time with the man it was hard not to know exactly what his tone of voice _actually_ meant.

"What?" Sometimes my intelligence astounds me.

Gaius just sighed, he'd also been around me long enough to know when I was lost inside my own head. "I just wanted to know why you were standing as still as a statue outside of this door."

"Well, I'm sure there's a reason…" My voice trailed off as I realized I really didn't have a good reason for being completely spaced out.

"Right. Well, if you think of it, let me know." The side of Gaius' mouth quirked upwards in a suppressed smile, his tone snarky.

I narrowed my eyes at his tone. After a short-lived staring contest I sighed and looked away, allowing Gaius to win. Even though I wasn't looking I could feel the smile on his face.

"Gaius?"

"What is it my boy?" Curiosity layering his answer.

I opened my mouth just to close it once again. I didn't know how to phrase t his next question. Gaius was one of the people I trusted the most and yet I didn't know how he would react to an increase in my power. He already believed that I was the most powerful warlock to ever live; and that was without this new ability.

"Whatever it is," Gaius began placing his right hand lightly on my left shoulder, "I'm sure I'll understand."

I took a deep breath, not wanting to look up at his face for reasons that not even I knew. Perhaps it had something to do with my new power. The thought solidified my resolve. I had to ask Gaius about this. Otherwise I would be in the dark about my own powers, something I never wanted to experience again. I had spent my whole life being oblivious to the amount of power I held and how rare and unique I truly was. I never wanted to experience anything like that again. With that in mind I started again, attempting to be slightly more confident this time.

"Have you ever heard of someone being able to…well…" My voice trailed off once again, much to my chagrin. I just couldn't seem to continue.

"Being able to what?" Gaius' voice was now once again curious. His love for mystery and magic obviously bubbling to the surface.

I sighed, this was going to be slightly awkward, but considering how I usually was it wouldn't be that much different from my regular life. "Being able to sense other people's emotions." My voice was barely above a whisper; luckily Gaius was standing close enough to me that he could hear me.

"Perhaps, why do you ask?" Gaius' eyes had narrowed minimally and his eyes were trained on me.

I fidgeted under the scrutiny, my uncomfortableness going up a couple notches. I know that he was just curious but I always felt weird being the center of attention; even if it was just under the eyes of one. I had to be, if I was an attention seeker I would've been killed long ago, being what I am. My mind circled the possibility. What if I had been outed as a Warlock when I was back in Ealdor? What would've happened? Would I have been dead?

I shook my head trying to dispel the thoughts, I had been doing that a lot lately; considering the 'what ifs'. It wasn't healthy and although I knew that it was remarkably difficult to stop that way of thinking once you started.

"The thing is.." My voice dropped to below a whisper. "I believe I've been feeling other's emotions."

Silence encroached upon us. Judging by his lack of speech even though I had lowered my voice he had heard me. I didn't know how he would react. Obviously the first thing he felt was shock, which wasn't surprising considering the revelation. Knowing this I attempted not to feel hurt that he didn't immediately accept me. He had to process the information. I just wished that he'd process it faster.

"Are you alright?" I had to break the silence. I had to know what he'd say, otherwise I thought I'd go mad.

"Yes, sorry; it's just…you took me by surprise is all." Gaius blinked several times, I had been so in my own mind that I hadn't noticed that he had been staring at me the whole time. It's quite funny what the mind blocks out when it wants to. "There hasn't been a reported case of an empath for…over two thousand years, and even that case was supposed to be just a story."

I was dumbfounded. An empath. A being that supposedly hadn't existed for thousands of years. My magic boiled up inside of me, reacting to the words. It knew what I was and was rejoicing that the knowledge had finally been bestowed upon me. My magic had finally had another part of it revealed. Bit by bit my magic's true self was coming into the light. Taking into account that my magic was me, and I was my magic, I was rejoicing along with it. I was learning more and more about myself. This was the second best thing I could think of occurring. The first of course being the acceptance of magic in the world.

So, even though I didn't know what exactly being an empath entailed, or what I could do, at least I knew what I was. I knew the name; and as they say, names hold an infinite amount of power.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading!<strong>

**Please review! I enjoy suggestions and as I am a lenient writer if you ask me to do something I most likely will...**

**Next on Destiny and Love:**

_There was rage. An all consuming rage that seemed to be directed straight at me. The emotion caused a bitter taste to form in the back of my throat._

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_I attempted to turn away from the sight but I found that I couldn't._

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	6. The Pain

**Hello! This chapter is a little bit short, but my last chapter was long...does that make up for it?**

**I'd like to once more thank everyone who has reviewed and alerted/favored. Thanks also go out to my beta _KeshoBesho._**

**I hope you enjoy...**

_Disclaimer: Merlin is not mine. _

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><p>The Pain-Chapter Six-The Pain<p>

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><p>We stood there staring at each other for a while, neither of us feeling the need to speak. Words were so ineffective when we knew each others facial expressions like the corridors of this castle in which we reside. Neither of us were lost to the expression of pure shock on the other's face. Yet our eyes were inchoately filling with a different emotion; a stronger one. That emotion was understanding, perhaps even love.<p>

As all things did, eventually our nonverbal form of communication was ceased. This time by something very different than the usual. This time the silence which we had been pleasantly basking in was unpleasantly broken by a sound. That sound was my scream.

I honestly don't know how it happened; one moment I was peaceful and content and the next I was in agony. My head felt as though it was going to explode. My skin tingled unpleasantly, as if thousands of needles were stabbing into my flesh. My eyes burned, my tears having the feel of acid as they ran down my face. My ears rang and had an uncomfortable plugged sensation to them.

Somehow I had managed to fall on my knees to the ground. My forehead was resting on the cool wooden floor, seeking relief from the pain. I continued to scream, but it became softer and transformed into a type of silent shriek as my throat became raw.

In some other sense I could feel Gaius' hands on my shoulders, his voice attempting to coax me out of the strange world I was entangled in. His voice was soft and smooth, but I didn't really register this on anything more than a subconscious level. My mind was far too ensnared by other images and feelings.

There was rage: an all consuming rage that seemed to be directed straight at me. The emotion caused a bitter taste to form in the back of my throat. Tears welled in my eyes. The emotion was cruel. Its intention was not lost to me; it was meant to harm me. To disable me. Although, most likely not as directly as it was. There was no way that the person with this emotion knew that I was feeling it so powerfully. That was not the real intention. The emotion was a means to an end. A way for my assailant to discover the courage to harm. Whoever this was, he or she was not anything short of corrupted.

The black murky emotion seemed to seep through my whole body, attacking me. It felt as though it was trying to tear me from inside out, dispose of me by just making me feel its malevolence. It was working. The pain it caused was near unbearable. Yet the emotion wasn't even the most painful aspect of the rage. The images were what really pushed me over the edge.

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><p>There was so much blood. It spilled lethargically out of bundles of meat. On closer inspection I realized that the meat was actually pieces of human. Severed limbs, decapitated heads, and tangled intestines all oozed the thick red liquid. In the midst of this hell stood a figure. Man or woman I could not discern. A darkness flowed around this mysterious figure like it was a being of its own. Yet in the same way it appeared as if the darkness and the other being were one and the same. My eyes burned just from looking at the unnatural occurrence.<p>

I attempted to turn away from the sight but I found that I couldn't. I didn't seem to have control over my movements. I was forced to follow the figure that was seemingly drenched in evil. He/she slowly dragged his/her feet across the field; and even though his/her face was covered by a hood it was obvious that he/she was looking at the carnage. A sense of demented glee washed over me. This time I could definitely attribute the feeling to my newfound empathic ability. I don't exactly know how but I just knew that it was my power telling me this. Perhaps because it was a part of me I instinctively knew; it was simply another mystery that piled on top of the many others concerning my magic.

The glee was disgusting, it radiated through my mind; projected by the only other living creature in the vicinity, the enigmatic figure. Apparently just seeing the darkness and evil coming off of the being wasn't enough; I was forced to_ feel_ its twisted ways as well.

The figure's steps were becoming bolder, bigger. They stepped around the severed limbs as if they put them there; which for all I knew they could have. My body, or at least my consciousness, was pulled along with the steps. It was a strange sensation, being pulled seemingly sideways to follow an absolute evil. It went against my very nature, yet I was helpless to stop.

The figure began to shake. At first I believed that it was from shock at the sight that it was being subjected to. I was wrong; he was laughing. The noise was carried with the wind towards me, the deep baritone of the noise informing me of the earlier unknown gender of the figure. If it weren't for the noise, I'm sure I would have blamed his shaking on tears.

The laughter sent a shiver down my currently incorporeal spine. As if the thick black mist that obviously showed his evil wasn't enough; I was forced to hear his laugh. It was the laugh of nightmares. A laugh which one would associate with a killer, with a madman. It was low and dark, yet mirth seeped into the tone of each breath. It was laugh of someone truly gleeful and in the place we were, it was horrifying. I couldn't understand how someone could laugh so happily at all of the death and blood that surrounded him. That surrounded _us_.

I once again tried to tear my eyes away from the man; the action was to no avail. I should've known that the attempt was hopeless, yet I still had to try, the maliciousness was becoming too much for me. The man was the very definition of wicked, the complete opposite of what I was. My whole body rebelled against being near him. I was beginning to feel sick being near him and I hoped that this encounter would soon end. I didn't know if I could take much more of his sinister presence.

Just as bile began to rise in my throat because of his presence, the man bent down, reaching a hand out towards one of the decapitated heads. My eyebrows furrowed, _was he going to caress the head? Was he going to show love?_ The thoughts felt so off, so wrong that I honestly almost laughed at them. I don't know why but I felt as though I knew this man and the idea of him showing love was most definitely laughable.

My instincts proved correct. The man instead curled his fingers roughly into the long, matted, blood stained hair of a woman recently killed, if the blood still flowing from her almost surgically severed neck was anything to go by. He then proceeded to stand up so slowly it seemed as if time had begun to gradually lag.

The decapitated head's hair was still firmly wrapped up in his fingers. It was raised higher until the dead face was only about five inches away from the man's. There was a definite shine under the hood of the man that I took for his eyes; the eyes held so much happiness as they looked at the mass in his hand.

The decapitated head was then brought underneath the hood of the man, so close that I couldn't even see the head behind the darkness which surrounded the man. Just as my curiosity almost overtook me and I was about to step forward a squelching crunch vibrated through the air. The noise stopped me in my tracks. It was followed by the snap of teeth chewing and then a loud swallow. To my horror the man brought the head out from beneath his hood. The woman's head now had an oozing hole, the size of a mouth, on her left temple.

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><p>My vision shifted dramatically, as did my awareness. I could once again hear Gaius' voice, now frantic, right beside my ear; his breath warming the side of my face. I could also feel the cool floor that my palms and forehead were resting upon. My breathing was erratic, my body and mind still in turmoil from the whole experience.<p>

As Gaius' voice grew louder I let out a shaky breath, trying to prepare myself for the explanation that I would be asked for. Turns out that I needn't worry about such matters at that moment, for when I opened my eyes my vision twirled. The wooden ground beneath me became a haze as black and white spots all flashed in my eyes. My consciousness immediately eluded me.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading. Sorry if it was a bit gruesome.<strong>

**Please Review...maybe? Yes? Good.**

**Next On Destiny and Love:**

_I could not find myself within it all. I was everyone. I was lost and it felt as though I would never return._

**xxxxxxxxxxxx**

_I had to summon the strength. The strength that I had gained from living the life I had._

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_Random Thought:_

_Oh, how I wish this wasn't just a façade, yet I know it is. I was so naïve to believe otherwise._


	7. The Mindscape

**I'm so sorry! I'm an awful person. I've actually had this written for . . . well, a month, I was just too lazy to get it beta'd.**

**I hope you enjoy it; even with the ridiculous wait for this chapter . . .**

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><p><em>Last Time on Destiny and Love:<em>

_The decapitated head was then brought underneath the hood of the man, so close that I couldn't even see the head behind the darkness which surrounded the man. Just as my curiosity almost overtook me and I was about to step forward a squelching crunch vibrated through the air. The noise stopped me in my tracks. It was followed by the snap of teeth chewing and then a loud swallow. To my horror the man brought the head out from beneath his hood. The woman's head now had an oozing hole, the size of a mouth, on her left temple._

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><p><em>My vision shifted dramatically, as did my awareness. I could once again hear Gaius' voice, now frantic, right beside my ear; his breath warming the side of my face. I could also feel the cool floor that my palms and forehead were resting upon. My breathing was erratic, my body and mind still in turmoil from the whole experience.<em>

_As Gaius' voice grew louder I let out a shaky breath, trying to prepare myself for the explanation that I would be asked for. Turns out that I needn't worry about such matters at that moment, for when I opened my eyes my vision twirled. The wooden ground beneath me became a haze as black and white spots all flashed in my eyes. My consciousness immediately eluded me._

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><p><strong><em>Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin . . . in this universe.<em>**

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><p>CHAPTER SEVEN<p>

_-Mindscape-_

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><p>I was being attacked. There were so many memories, thoughts, images, and feelings. I was sure that my brian was going to explode from all of the information. How could it not? It was as if every mind in Camelot, and perhaps beyond, was open for me to see. For me to peruse. Although right now it felt as though the thoughts were being pushed upon me. Every one of them fighting for dominance in my mind; effectively causing a loud cacophony of words that all shouted and overlapped one another.<p>

I could't find myself within it all. I was everyone. I was lost and it felt as though I would never return. The others were overriding my own sense of self. This left me in a dangerous predicament; if they didn't leave soon I was going to be lost forever. They had to leave, or perhaps I had to dominate them.

I had to summon the strength. The strength that I had gained from living the life I had. The strength from the fear that I had been accompanied by every day of my life. The strength I was given by others who believed in me. The strength I was given by magic. My magic. It had always been there and would continue to be there for me. It defined who I was and what I did. It was my strength.

With the thoughts now reverberating around the walls of my own mind, quieting the others, I felt my eyes begin to burn; soon followed by the rest of my body. The magic was fighting back; I was fighting back. I was encased in the brilliance that was magic and all I felt was an overwhelming sensation of acceptance, of love.

The other voices and minds had all been silenced by the display. Judging by the feel I got from them, they were entranced. The magic had truly enthralled them. I couldn't help but laugh. My magic was sending out love to everyone. To those in pain, those who were brimming with sadness, even those who already had love. My magic and I, being one and the same, did our best to calm all of those who had entered our realm; who had entered my mind. They deserved the happiness that we so readily gave them; even those who had been corrupted by something did indeed need our love-if not more so.

The voices slowly began to leave; they were content. They had received what they had come for and more. If only the voices weren't just the subconscious thoughts of those around me. If they weren't I would have been able to cure most of the despair that lingered in those around me with just this simple action. Unfortunately all I had managed to do was succeed in ceasing the attack that had been waged against me.

I was finally able to rest. After all of the mental assaults that I had been submitted to today, the unawareness that began to surround me now was utter bliss.

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><p>My ears were the first to awaken. The first to acknowledge that anything was happening around me; other than my magic, which was always protecting me, especially in slumber.<p>

The noise around me was dead, except for the soft movement of air caused by breath. If I stretched my hearing sense even further I could hear the shuffling of feet on stone further away from the breathing sound. Extending my sense to its very limit, without the assistance of magic, I could hear the movements of many throughout the castle. Some were running from one place to another, others pacing with sporadic steps.

My feeling of touch was the next to come back. Instead of the cool hard floor beneath my fingertips as I had expected there was a soft, warm, pliable substance giving in beneath the pressure I applied. My head was resting on an equally comfortable substance; all in all I was very comfortable and I was definitely not on the ground. I had been moved.

I tried to think back to exactly _why_ I had thought I would be on the floor in the first place, considering when I usually woke up I was in my bed, my complete confusion at this fact was a bit disconcerting. Why would I believe that I would awaken on the ground?

I kept my eyes closed and activated my mind into a state of complete concentration and reflection. I searched through my memories, attempting to understand when I had fallen asleep; hoping that this information would cause more of an understanding to my initial reaction to the place in which I found myself when my senses returned.

The surface thoughts were the first ones I bypassed, the types of thoughts that were always playing in the subconscious of everyone's mind. They were superficial and mundane thoughts, best left for the subconscious to dwell upon while the conscious mind took care of more intricate and pressing matters.

I continued to delve deeper and deeper within my subconscious looking for the memories that I had unconsciously blocked. They were obviously traumatic memories, the type of memories which no one wished to remember. The type of memories which one would suppress because of pain and hate. The type of memories filled with pain and depression. The type of memories which one had a hate for, a type of hate which made you want to do something drastic. Something that you would most likely later regret. It was obviously a memory which the mind hid in order to keep sane; for with it one would break and although I knew this, I continued the search. I was much too inquisitive for my own good.

The deeper I went inside my mind the more pain I found. I tried to bypass all of it but it was difficult when it seemingly filled every single space my mind had. There was the pain from the loss of all of those whom I loved. The pain of every time someone with magic was executed. The pain of those around me berating magic and vehemently calling it evil. It was all there in my mind, clamoring me to acknowledge it; just like with the emotions of all those around me.

The thought grew to an idea within me, a plan of sorts. All I had to do now was the same thing I had done with the voices. I needed to console them, overpower them, then I would be free to continue my search. Or at least in theory I would be.

I shook the doubts away; I _would_ find out what my mind had chosen to suppress. I took a deep breath, well, the equivalent of a deep calming breath that one can have within one's own mind. The berth succeeded in lowering the qualms I had concerning my plans, I would pass this point in myself and find what I'm looking for. With a newfound determination flowing fiercely through me I set about calming the rage of emotions trying to tear me apart and cause me to cease my search for the recent memories.

The older memories filled me with pain, but they were no match to my current state of mind. I sent out waves of consolation and love. It felt weird at first, sending out love towards myself. Yet, I knew that it was what I needed. I needed to forgive myself, something I had never really done for any of these memories; it was no wonder that these memories were so angry. They had been neglected and pushed to the back of mind without a thought of consideration for the pain. In short, I was mad at myself and now I was consoling myself; if there was ever a more strange situation I had never been in it.

The memories began to fade in their intensity. The warmth that I was filling them with finally taking effect as one by one they became just a dull forever-lasting throb in my heart. The type of throb that I would never forget but I would also be able to stand; they wouldn't attack me again. With the memories taken care of I took another deep breath inside of my mindscape and continued on with my quest.

It turns out that I needn't worry about a long tedious journey for almost instantaneously I was in front of a huge wooden door. The door was carved with numerous magical symbols; symbols I recognized from books I had read on the art of sealing. The one thing which perplexed me was how it had gotten there. Unfortunately I would have to take care of that later, currently I was consumed by the door.

It held a pull that only magical objects did. Except, this door was so much more powerful than any other object I had ever encountered. This door positively s_creamed _its magical prowess. I was sure that if any human saw the door even they would be able to feel its magic.

My hand was now inches away from the door's handle, I hadn't even noticed that I had been moving towards it. My hand moved closer and fell upon the door.

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><p><strong>I'm so rude; I know! How dare I end it there, but don't you worry, I already have a lot of the next chapter written . . . kind of.<strong>

**Um, thanks to my beta, KeshoBesho.**

**Review if you feel the urge to do so.**

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><p><em><strong>Next on Destiny and Love:<strong>_

_**My eyes, although open, unseeing, everything was a blur as colors played across my vision. Some of the colors were moving while others stayed in the same place that they were seemingly always in.**_

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_**I couldn't help but let a sigh escape the cavern of my mouth; the exasperation caused from all of the events which had come to life at once was getting to me.**_


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